Do not expect gratitude from anyone
Allah, the
Almighty, created His slaves so that they may worship and remember Him, and He
provided sustenance for them so that they may be grateful to Him. Nevertheless,
many have worshipped other than Him and the masses are thankful not to Him, but
to others, because the characteristic of ingratitude is widespread among human
beings. So do not be dismayed when you find that others forget your favors or
disregard your kind acts. Some people might even despise you and make you an
enemy for no other reason than that you have shown them kindness.
And they could
not find any cause to bear a grudge, except that Allah and His Messenger had
enriched them of His
Bounty. is
(Qur'an 9: 74)
From among the
ever-repeating pages of history is a story of a father and his son: the former
raised him, fed him, clothed him and taught him; he would stay up nights so that
his son could sleep, stay hungry so that his son could eat, and he would toil so
that his son could feel comfort. And when the son became older and stronger, he
rewarded his father with disobedience, disrespect, and contempt.
So be at peace
if you are requited with ungratefulness for the good you have done. Rejoice in
your knowledge that you will be rewarded from the One Who has unlimited
treasures at His disposal.
This is not to
say that you should refrain from performing acts of kindness towards others: the
point is that you should be mentally prepared for ingratitude.
Perform acts of
charity seeking Allah's pleasure, because with this attitude you will assuredly
be successful. The ungrateful person cannot really harm you: praise Allah that
that person is the transgressor and that you are the obedient servant. Also,
remember that the hand that gives is better than the hand that receives.
We feed you
seeking Allah's Countenance only We wish for no reward, nor thanks from you.
(Qur'an 76: 9)
Many people are
shocked at the nature of ingratitude in others, as though they had never come
across this verse and others like it:
And when harm
touches man, he invokes Us, lying down on his side, or sitting or standing. But
when We have removed his harm from him, he passes on his way as if he had never
invoked Us for a harm that touched him! (Qur'an 10: 12)
Hence do not be
in a state of agitation if you give someone a pen as a gift and he uses it to
satirize you, or if you give someone a walking stick to lean upon and he strikes
you with it. As I pointed out earlier, most human beings are ungrateful to their
Lord, so what treatment should you and 1 expect?
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